Gosh, marriage can be difficult, am I right?
I mean, they tell us this…our parents…our grandparents…the world. They tell us that although it can be one of the most amazing adventures, marriage is tricky.
A lot can happen outside our control that can change our thoughts, our perspectives, and can create some unwanted space between ourselves and our spouses.
It’s friction.
It is in times like these that we need to reconnect with our spouses more than ever. Don’t allow more space to build…don’t allow a small altercation to turn into something so big that it is hard to bounce back from altogether.
Fight for your marriage by reconnecting with your spouse again, reminding him/her that you are in this thing called life together and are willing to do what is necessary to rekindle the fire.
4 Ways to Reconnect with your Spouse
Date Monthly (if not more)
As life gets busy, it can be hard to make time for each other, but TIME for EACHOTHER is exactly what you need to keep your marriage alive and growing!
A date night doesn’t have to be overly extravagant. Maybe you can go for a walk together and have some wine after. Or maybe you get outside and spare a couple of hours to play a fun game of pickleball. Whatever “date” you decide on, use the time to talk about what is going on in your life. Discuss your goals, concerns, stresses, etc…any and all of the things that have been forming obstacles between the two of you.
Grab a Communication Journal
With all the distractions of the world, it is easy to go through the motions of marriage without truly growing with each other. A date night journal like this is an amazing way to actually TALK about the important stuff in marriage…before the “stuff” becomes a problem.
This DATE NIGHT journal offers discussion prompts that encourage you to discuss topics like finances, familial relationships, kids, goals, fears, etc.
Because the journal is doing the asking, it eliminates any tension that may arise from one person bringing up the topic…which is a huge plus!
Participate in a Walking Challenge
When we were pregnant with our fifth child, I felt completely disconnected from my “normal” life. I didn’t know exactly how to talk to my husband about it, nor did I know how to talk to anyone else about it. I felt like my physical health was failing: I put on the pregnancy weight, my hormones were all over the place, and I felt like I didn’t have any goals for the future since the next seven months of my life were well dictated by the pregnancy. It was then that I knew I needed to force myself to do something for my health as well as my relationship with my husband, since he is and always will be my rock when I am emotionally/mentally unstable.
So, I asked him if he wanted to walk 40 miles in 40 days with me! Ha!
For me, there were only two rules. We had to walk all forty miles, but could walk any amount of miles daily. So, we didn’t have to go the same distance every day. Secondly, we had to walk all the miles without any noise (podcast, music, etc.)
He added one more rule: we had to walk them together! (No splitting them up!)
Not only did this challenge help us both physically, but it forced us to make time in our schedule FOR US. (Which was typically at night, after the kids were in bed. We only went a short distance from the house since most of our kids were still on the younger side.)
We also made huge gains emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. We made sure to discuss all the things on our mind…being honest and open with each other as much as possible!
Highly recommend this idea!
Take a mini va- or stay-cation together.
Quality time with each other, away from all the “stuff” can be so good for your marriage!
Pick somewhere simple where you have time to adventure but also time to relax. Use this relaxing time to talk and enjoy each other again. This vacation doesn’t have to cost a fortune and truly doesn’t have to be extensive in any way…but the key is to eliminate your phones…eliminate your work…eliminate your kids (just for the vacation lol 😉) and spend some quality time together without all the noise. Maybe you can work through questions in the journal mentioned above. Maybe you can simply spend time together without talking at all…if ya know what I mean! Either way, a short time away together can do your marriage so much good!
With all this being said…
You are already on the right track! Why? Because you are recognizing that there is something to be worked on in your marriage AND you are looking for ways to work through it. You are not running from it. You are not ignoring it. You are facing it head on!
Proud of you, friend!
